Ugh. Feeling pretty shcrappy this morning. Darn spring cold, doesn’t it know I don’t have time for such nonsense? Kind of that place where I can function, so I don’t think I’m bad enough to stay home. But, of course, by 2:00 this afternoon I will likely feel quite differently about that. Should stay home. Rest. Recover. But I won’t. I can’t. The job calls. I’m needed. At least that’s what I tell myself. I have to be there.

What if “C” needs a place to cry? She might forget where the tissue is. Maybe three boxes at convenient locations in the room is not enough. Maybe I should place a fourth.

“N” might need water. You know what they say, “Hydrate or die.” Can’t have kids keeling over from thirst.

Maybe the sub won’t let “E” draw. She has to draw, even when I am talking. It, as I’ve shared before, is her oxygen.

“C” might need me to read her paper for the sixth time, ’cause, well five is probably not enough, and ending on an odd number is bad luck, right? Don’t they say that?

How will I know if “M” smiles, “My boys are here”? You know, the if-a-tree-falls-in-the-forest thing. Wonder if when I am gone, he frowns, “My boy’s not here.”

What if “A” has another breakthrough moment as writer? That’s like missing your kid’s birthday party. Can I miss that?

Okay, I’m done. Truth is, I don’t have to be there. I want to be there. I want to believe that they need me to be there. And maybe, on some level, I am worried that they’ll discover they don’t need me there if I am not. They’d be fine. They’ll be fine.

Fifty days from now they’re leaving anyway. Maybe that’s it. Maybe separation anxiety is beginning to creep into my being, and I am caught up in the mixed blessing of being connected. Silly human. Nothing lasts forever. Threads wear thin, and eventually, things come undone, but still, we cling while we can.

Alas, all, silly humans.

Today’s Trail

Along today’s trail we will experience…

…connecting through Smiles and Frowns.

…completing the body of our argumentative letters.

…reflecting in our Journey Journals.

…hearing a Sappy Sy Rhyme.

Happy Thursday, all.

Do. Reflect. Do Better.