Though I stand firmly behind the assertion that everything in the classroom depends on relationships, I think it’s important to acknowledge that one cannot simply chant “Relationships. Relationships. Relationships,” and expect everything to magically fall into place, like “Ta Da!” Of course, when talking about my own classroom and the successes–and failures–I’ve had, I have offered the relationship chant. In fact, I catch myself doing it all the time, and while there is certainly something to it, it stops short of presenting the reality of relationships in the classroom: relationships are work. All relationships are, even our best and most important ones. And just as my relationships with my wife, Mom, best friend, children, and the list goes on require constant attention and effort, so do my relationships with my students.

And though I beat my drum to this all the time–and will continue to do so, it all begins with how we want people to feel. I stand by that. I live by that, for it is the feelings from that “connectedness” that foster the relationships we have with those around us. How I make you feel will ultimately determine the nature and strength of our relationship. So, when I think about the kinds of relationships I want with my students, I consider how I want and need them to feel to create the classroom culture that I desire.

In my classroom, I want you to feel…

Connected

Empowered

Respected

Valued

Challenged

Supported

 

I have shared these before. And I will likely share them again, for they are my standards; they are how I judge my success. And while I daily reflect on my meeting–or not meeting–these standards, there is a lot of preparatory, behind-the-scenes planning and front loading that goes into creating the culture of “my room.” Below are the rights and routines that I handed the kids at the beginning of the year. I want them to feel valued and connected, so I refer to them as members of our learning community. I don’t call them “rules.” I want them to feel respected, I call them rights and responsibilities. Further, I want them to feel empowered by the notion that they have rights, that they have the right to expect certain things from their education, and they can and should call me out when their needs are not being met. I could continue my analysis, but here’s my point: I am very intentional about creating culture, about developing real relationships with my kids. It’s so much more than chanting “relationships!”

I do have great relationships with my kids, but it is a lot of hard and consistent work. I have had a number of people recently inquiring about my entry task, Smiles and Frowns. And I am thrilled by their interest in my approach, but I would gently caution that it’s not just a sideshow or cute activity, it’s a deeply embedded routine that fits the full scheme of my desired classroom culture. Of all that I have committed to this year to bring about student success in my room, it has been the top priority from day one. I decided 163 days ago that my kids’ feeling connected would get prioritized over everything, and I best do that with Smiles and Frowns. Recently, in my end of the year evaluation, I was pleased that my supervisor noted and complimented my work.

 

Component 1.3: Understanding Students’ Interests and Backgrounds

The teacher builds positive relationships with students by understanding students’ interests and background.

Thank you for taking the time to do smiles and frowns. I know it is difficult to take time away from “academics,” but I know you are well aware of the value of getting to know about student’s lives outside of class. It’s strange, because I’ve had moments during weeks when I’ve thought to myself, “I could share that during smile and frowns.” This practice gives you a quick reference for how a student might be acting in class. When they are having an “off” day, you’re aware of that before class begins. Nice job keeping the pace quick so that this is helpful, but doesn’t overtake class. 

 

I am pleased that she sees the value in my taking time to be connected to my kids. It is not an accident. It is an investment. And it has paid dividends this year. Relationships and all the work that goes into them have the power to impact student success, academically and behaviorally. Not arrogantly–yes, kids like my class; yes, I am popular. Yes, my class looks and feels different from a traditional classroom. And I think some teachers begrudge that and think that I am only doing it to be popular among the kids, but I think they misunderstand, and I think they don’t really see or know what goes on in my classroom. I have written zero referrals this year, and once again over 90% of my kids met or exceeded proficiency standards on the Smarter Balanced Assessment. The latter, I don’t really care about, but some do–likely the same some who think that Smiles and Frowns is akin to sitting in a circle singing Kumbaya. I am sorry that they do not see. I am sorry that they do not see the impact that relationships can have on student success. We don’t need rules and rigidity to create success. We just need to connect with kids on a human level. I think it is that simple. Truly.

Rights

As a member of this community, you have the following rights.

I have the right to feel safe.

I have the right to learn.

I have the right to ask as many questions as I want.

I have the right to make mistakes and not fear penalty.

I have the right to “prove” my learning in various ways.

I have the right to feedback as an essential part of my learning.

I have the right to access my teacher for help whenever possible.

I have the right to eat and drink in class.

I have the right to express that my rights are not being granted or protected.

 

Responsibilities

Beyond your rights, you will also have responsibilities as a member of our learning community.

I have a responsibility to get to class on time. If I am late, I will not disrupt the class. I will quietly apologize and sit down. I understand that if my being late becomes a habit, my teacher and I will have to find a solution.

I have a responsibility to know and honor the routines of this class.

I have a responsibility of monitoring my behavior so I do not disrupt the learning of my community members.

I have a responsibility to self-regulate my use of electronic devices in this room. I will keep my device stored out of sight until the Brain Break or when I have been given permission to use it as a tool. I understand that if I cannot self-regulate, my teacher will ask me to keep my device on her desk during class. I may have it back during Brain Break. I will also have future opportunities to prove I can self-regulate.

I have a responsibility to be a great listener. This means, I will not talk while others are talking; I will visually track/connect with the speaker; and I will use gestures to demonstrate that I am listening.

I have a responsibility to self-regulate my leaving the room. I may go to the bathroom when I need to, but I need to work at keeping my leaving to a minimum.

I have a responsibility to take ownership for my learning. It is my learning.

I have a responsibility to be sensitive to and respectful of others’ viewpoints. In short, I have a responsibility to be kind.

I have a responsibility to clean my space before I leave for the day.

 

Interventions for when I do not meet the obligations of my responsibilities.

Reminder(s)

Conversation(s)

Parent Contact

Office Referral (It is unlikely that I will ever get to this point.)

 

Today’s Trail

Along today’s trail we will…

…begin with Smiles and Frowns.

…write our conclusions for our Be a Voice speeches.

…end with a Sappy Sy Rhyme.

Happy Monday, all. Sorry for the long post. Have a splendid day.

Do. Reflect. Do Better.