“Sy, I need your help with the introduction.”

“Okay, what’s getting in the way?”

She is one of my best writers, and so I was surprised that something as seemingly simple as a self-intro was giving her trouble.

“Well. Well, I…how do I say this? I don’t know how to write it without sounding rude or conceited. As you know, I am not really into this whole connection thing, and I don’t want to be fake, but I don’t want people to take things the wrong way, either. I’m stuck.”

I do know. A reluctant sharer in Smiles and Frowns, she “passes” most of the time, and I have come to accept and respect that, knowing it’s simply a matter of her wanting to keep to herself. But with the parameters I’ve set for the intro, really for the project, it’s kinda hard to keep to oneself.

For the intro, I asked the kids to approach it from a place of familiarity: Please write this with us and the year in mind. Please write it with a familiar, conversational tone. It’s just us.

“Ah,” I responded, “it’s the familiarity thing isn’t it?”

“Yeah. It’s not that I haven’t found any familiarity or created any connections; I just think it’d be weird to all the sudden “gush familiarity.” It’s not me. When we began the year, and you introduced the idea of community and connection through Smiles and Frowns, I was not thrilled. In fact, my thinking was, ‘No one in here cares what I have to say, and I don’t care what they have to say either.’ I wasn’t here to get to know people. I like classes that are get down to business, and so I was annoyed that we’d have to spend time getting to know each other.”

“I know. Sorry that my class has not been that class for you. It’s just how I do things.”

“I know. And my mind has changed over the year, at least with this class. I do know that people in here care about each other, and they do care about what I say. I have experienced a transformation, but it’s still feels weird to act like we’re all familiar now. That’s why it’s hard. So, I don’t know how to write my intro.”

“I think you just did, kiddo. Just be honest with us. Just be yourself. That’s who we expect and want you to be. On day one, when I introduced Smiles and Frowns, I also told you what your number one role was in here for the year: Be yourself. Just be yourself. Tell us about your struggle, your transformation. Speak your truth.”

“Okay. I can do that. Thank you for talking through this with me.”

“Of course. Thank you for coming to me with this. I don’t ever want you to be who you are not.”

Roles
Here are the various roles that I will need you to play over the course of the year. Sometimes, our day’s path will require you play one specific role; most times, our path will require that you play many simultaneously. Either way, I promise I will not ask you to stretch yourself beyond your limits. You got this.

Role #1: Yourself. This is your most important role. I need you to be who you are. I realize that the setting in which we find ourselves sometimes impacts our ability to be ourselves, but my hope is that the classroom community and culture we create during our time together will give each of us the comfort and confidence to be who we are. This is the role that matters most to me as I join you in your journey this year. I am excited to know YOU.

Not everyone likes the kumbaya of community and connection. I know that. I get that. And that’s why I am so proud of Jessica (name changed) for coming to me with her truth. It could not have been easy for her. In the end, I am glad we could find a way to make it work for her. By the way, the writing that she has prepared to share with her peers is unbelievable. I cannot wait to experience her and their reactions to the shared moment. And though she’s not about connections, I think she will not soon forget this opportunity to connect with her peers. Connections.

Today’s Trail

Along today’s trail we will experience…

…reconnecting through Smiles and Frowns.

…growing as writers (2 days till the project wraps up and presentations begin).

…reflecting in our Journey Journals.

…hearing a Sappy Sy Rhyme.

Happy Monday, all.

Do. Reflect. Do Better.