Somewhere along the way we got lost. We veered from the path and ended up in a place where “help” became anathema in education.

Maybe it’s rugged American individualism. Maybe it’s a hyper-competitive culture. Maybe it’s a hide-weakness-at-all-costs attitude. Regardless, our kids tend to hide from help, and the farther they get into their journeys, the more they hide.

But why? And how? How did we get to a place where our job is to help only to find ourselves operating in a space where kids are afraid to ask us to perform our primary function? If we are not helping, are we teaching? If kids aren’t asking for help, are they learning?

Of course this is nothing new. I, too, remember hiding from help for the entirety of my experiences in school. And the only times I did ask for help was when I had reached a point of desperation and shouldered the shame, or I had a teacher who invited us to ask questions, who made “help” an accepted, expected part of the deal, but the latter was few and far between. Seeking help was never comfortable. Never.

Nothing new. Nothing has changed. Yesterday, I encountered a troubling experience with a young lady during fourth period. Troubling on two levels. One, she told me that asking for help made her feel stupid, Two–and this is most troubling, she was afraid to ask me for help. Me? Dang. And I work really hard–or so I thought–to make questions, to make help a necessary, a welcomed dynamic in our classroom. Here was the gist of our exchange.

She came out of hiding. She sought help. She got help. A lot. And I loved every minute of it. IT’S WHY I AM IN THE ROOM! No, it wasn’t easy for either of us. Learning is work, work that requires help. So, it was deeply gratifying for me to be that for her. I hope she turned a corner yesterday. I hope she is less-afraid to ask for help. I hope all my kids are, and I plan to make a point–again–of telling them that they must ask me for help. Must.

I dream of a new place in education, a place where help is the currency, where kids ask for help as not a sign of weakness but as a sign of power, expecting no less from their teachers. Help should be an expectation, a living, breathing entity in every classroom. Of this I dream.

Today’s Trail

Along today’s trail we will experience…

…connecting through Smiles and Frowns.

…responding to feedback.

…finishing our essays.

…reflecting in our Journey Journals.

…hearing a Sappy Sy Rhyme.

Happy Wednesday, all.

Do. Reflect. Do Better.