“Sy, I can’t do it. I can’t present to the whole class.”

“I know.”

Interestingly, maybe ironically, her topic for her project was “responsibility.” In truth, it’s her second topic. The first one was “love,” but she lost her nearly six-minute “documentary” that she had created as her medium (for reals, I saw it), asking scores of people to define love. And it deflated her. And though I offered to call it even, for I knew what she had done, she insisted of her own volition to do another project. But there was a catch. She still wasn’t going to present it to the class. Of course, I already knew that.

I’ve known it since the first day of class when she came to me in near-panic over having to share from our “Meet Me” activity. She had informed me then, as she still informs me now, “she doesn’t share with large groups.”

A younger Sy would have insisted. She has to learn to face her fears. It’s part of her responsibility for completing the project. A younger Sy, was not so wise. But he has learned.

But what about responsibility? What about facing fear? For the former, she wasn’t avoiding her responsibility. She did all the work–twice. Never once have I felt like she was shirking on her responsibilities. In fact, in some regard, she has shouldered more than most of her “responsible” peers, who have presented their work to the entire class. For the latter, I’m not gonna do it. I am not sure it is my responsibility to force kids into situations in which they have confided and demonstrated genuine fear over. Call me irresponsible.

So what did I do? I sat down with her one-on-one for her interview and presentation. She came in on her own time and for nearly ten minutes she transfixed me with her impressive work. She demonstrated poise. She used just the right voice for the space, speaking every word clearly. She exhibited life, as she was obviously into her work and topic, showing emotion and enthusiasm. She made and held eye contact. She used gestures that were helpful and not distracting. And she moved at a sufficient speed, slowing down and speeding up when necessary. She did all these things. Just not in front of her peers.

In the end, I believe my responsibility is about meeting my kids where they are and providing the opportunities that help them grown and learn. I don’t think it’s about forcing one-size-fits situations. Of course, such an approach can be a little unconventional and even overwhelming at times, but I’ve never been afraid of “doing different” and taking on a bit more for my kids.

She couldn’t present to the class.

Okay.

Such things don’t need to be game-over situations. They can simply be game-changing situations. We can change the game, especially when we are the ones making the rules.

Today’s Trail

Along today’s trail we will experience…

…connecting through Smiles and Frowns.

…wrapping up (mostly) interviews and presentations.

…reflecting in our Journey Journals.

…hearing a Sappy Sy Rhyme.

Happy Friday, all. Have a great weekend.

Do. Reflect. Do Better.