Another 3:00 AM start, but I got it done: a Sappy Sy Rhyme for each kid, for each class. Glad I continued the tradition. Believe I would have missed an important opportunity to cement and seal the yearlong relationship I have worked so hard to build with my little humans.
Today, I say goodbye to periods 2, 4, and 6. Yesterday, the farewell was harder than I expected. I got choked up reading the Sappy Sy to period 3, and we all had a good cry. Haven’t done that since I cried at the end of year two, twenty-one years ago. The mixed blessing of connections. Wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Though tomorrow is officially our last day. Today wraps up Project 180: Year Three. My count got a bit off with snow days. In all, it has been an amazing year, and I am looking forward to reflecting and recharging this summer to get ready for Year Four. Will write some more tomorrow about that. For now, here are the Sappy Sy Rhymes for today.
Sappy Period 2
Up at 3:00 AM
Tryin’ to find a rhyme
Gotta do my Sappy
One last time
But this one’s different
Special you see
It’s the last one
To you from me
So here it is
Here we go
To all the young people
I love and know
First there’s Brady
A quiet fellow.
Bright and insightful
But always mellow.
Philip, my biggest
Regret to tell
“Cause I failed to bring
Him out of his shell
Josh, himself
He generously shared
And consequently
We all cared
Emily our friend
Though she’s cool
Seems a little confused about
The word high school
Mohammed smiles
But only sometimes
On Tuesday and Thursday
It’s Access Time!
Ava, not Ah-Vuh
For her part
Let us see some
Of her great big heart
Oh that Jessie
Her spirit a force
I will miss her dearly
As a matter of course
Addison
A gentle spirit I find
I think there’s more than he shows
In his mind.
Danny boy
Kind and true
I’m so glad
I now know you
Milana so kind
Faced her fears
We’ll never forget
Your genuine tears
Ciera, one thing
I think it worthwhile
Please never hide
Your fantastic smile.
Chelsey, I’m glad
you made it here
Thank you for
A wonderful year
For Jeremiah
A great big thanks
I now know more
About Army tanks
Esteban, I’m sorry
It’s been hard of late
Summer’s near
Not long to wait
Braedon, thank you
For stepping up
You gave me hope
You filled my cup
Beckett, though serious
Has got some funny
And he can run like
The Energizer bunny
Joshua S
Knows what he wants
He shows it through confidence
Neither brags nor flaunts
Ashley T
I know it’s been rough
But through it all
You’ve been pretty tough
Kyle, it’s okay
I think I understand
School doesn’t always fit
Everyone’s plan
Bae, here
Here in the end
I’ve discovered many are proud
To call you friend
Eva, thank you
For sharing your spice
Sorry I ever
Skated thin ice
And now it seems
We’ve reached the end
And for that I’m sad
My dear young friends
I will miss you more
Than I can convey
But I hope these words
Will with you stay
Connections matter
They get us through
Could not have done this
Without you
You shared yourselves
Your ups and downs
You daily shared
Your Smiles and Frowns.
Look around
What do you see?
Not just a class
But a community
So, as you go
As you leave
As you follow
Your path that weaves
In and out
And around
Remember the connections
That you’ve found
And build some more
As you go
For it’s not how far you get
It’s how well you know
I’ve done this now
For twenty three
But more connected
I’m not sure I’ve been
I cannot, will not
Forget you ever
You have all, dear friends
Made me better.
Thank you. I will miss you. I love you.
Sappy Period 4
Up at 3:00 AM
Tryin’ to find a rhyme
Gotta do my Sappy
One last time
But this one’s different
Special you see
It’s the last one
To you from me
So here it is
Here we go
To all the young people
I love and know
First, there’s Jade
A little crazy at that
Please be careful
With your tats
Anni, I know
The secret to your art
It’s because you have
Such a great big heart
Jackson lives
And Jackson learns
Please, young friend
No more burns
Kellen I will
Remember ever
Your one true love
Dr. Pepper
Thomas passed
And it’s okay
We’re just glad
You’re in our day
Dom must be
An awesome friend
‘Cause she puts up
That kid named Bren
Danielle so nice
Never mean
And she’s also
The sandwich queen
A.C.’s quiet
Of that no doubt
But just once I’d love
To hear him shout
And then Leonie
Our German friend
So sad it’s come
To an end
Zach’s the man
He’s the start
To Smiles and Frowns
He plays his part
Bren that poem
Was no full senda
Made us say
Dammit, Brenda
Jake our drummer
He plays in the band
No one can do it
Like Jacob can
Ty learned
The toughest lesson of all
You can’t win a fight
Against a wall
Cassie I know
Maybe not well
But thank you for coming
Out of your shell
Jordyn takes care
Of all like a Mom
We tease her a bit
But she’s really the bomb
Caleb I hate
To say “so long”
Take care of yourself
Keep staying strong
Ryan P
A man on a trek
I hope you create
The best Magic deck
Eve the wonder
She shares her art
Eve the wonder
Creates from her heart
Jordan’s got layers
We never knew
She’s traveled a lot
And climbs rocks, too
Ryan R
He’s the man
Not much he can’t do
With a tool in his hand
Germaine’s got style
Not to be dissed
Check out the bracelets
He wears on his wrist
Tarrah your silence
Speaks to me
I understand
I hope you see
Maria grew tall
In front of our eyes
Courage is much more
Than physical size
Mikey the Godfather
The boys in his care
He seems most happy
When they are there
Where is Tyler?
He’ll be a bit late
We’ve come to accept
That maybe it’s fate
And last there’s Shai
Who finally shared
I think it’s ‘cause
She learned we cared
And now it seems
We’ve reached the end
And for that I’m sad
My dear young friends
I will miss you more
Than I can convey
But I hope these words
Will with you stay
Connections matter
They get us through
Could not have done this
Without you
You shared yourselves
Your ups and downs
You daily shared
Your Smiles and Frowns.
Look around
What do you see?
Not just a class
But a community
So, as you go
As you leave
As you follow
Your path that weaves
In and out
And around
Remember the connections
That you’ve found
And build some more
As you go
For it’s not how far you get
It’s how well you know
I’ve done this now
For twenty three
But more connected
I’m not sure I’ve been
I cannot, will not
Forget you ever
You have all, dear friends
Made me better.
Thank you. I will miss you. I love you.
Sappy Period 6
Up at 3:00 AM
Tryin’ to find a rhyme
Gotta do my Sappy
One last time
But this one’s different
Special you see
It’s the last one
To you from me
So here it is
Here we go
To all the young people
I love and know
First there’s Izzy
A truer friend, no lyin
She takes care
Of that crazy Ryan
Brent you must
Be annoyed
That Apple bested
Your Android
Henry won
At least he said
But Emma corrects him
With a shake of her head
Gabby, sweet Gabby
Doesn’t say much
But her words when shared
Our hearts do touch
And then there’s Hannah
Who joined us late
But we’re so glad she did
Because she’s so great
Carl tells stories
Every day
He can’t help it
It’s just his way
Emma I never
Ever knew
Anyone could say “thanks”
As sincerely as you.
Ariana
I just gotta say
Not sure how you put up with
Your friend miss Jay
Karina all year
You’ve made me smile
I respect your strength
I admire your style.
Emily indeed
You may be small
But if courage were height
You’d be taller than all
Peter your words
Speak no lies
Thank you young friend
For sharing your wise
Cade remember
The good ol’ days?
Sorry that Henry
Changed his ways
Lauren a gift
To all who live
Thank you for
The kindness you give
Steven you now
Know how to fly
Glad you made it
Glad you survived
Evelina
Your name like a song
Glad you’ve been
Here all along
Martin someday
Little sis will grow
And life will be easier
Believe it so
Alexis your talents
Do impress
You do so much
Better than best
Clayton so glad
You’ve been in the ‘hood
I will always remember
“Life is good.”
Joslyn you let
Us know a whole lot
Your stories of family
Our attention caught
Mer, I believe
This to be true
There aren’t many people
Better than you
Kyla the player
A softball great
Glad you joined us
Even if late
Hannah we will
Remember always
With folded paper
You did us amaze
Nat a deep look
You with us shared
I hope it’s because
You knew we cared
Halle reminded
Us about caring
That it all comes from a word
That she called sharing
Ian proved
To us daily
There’s nothing more
Than one’s family
Ryan you have
Made us all smile
We love your crazy
And Guy F. style
Genn tried
To talk each day
But her crazy laugh
Got in the way
And last Jayla
Not to tattle
But with her friends
She loves to battle
And now it seems
We’ve reached the end
And for that I’m sad
My dear young friends
I will miss you more
Than I can convey
But I hope these words
Will with you stay
Connections matter
They get us through
Could not have done this
Without you
You shared yourselves
Your ups and downs
You daily shared
Your Smiles and Frowns.
Look around
What do you see?
Not just a class
But a community
So, as you go
As you leave
As you follow
Your path that weaves
In and out
And around
Remember the connections
That you’ve found
And build some more
As you go
For it’s not how far you get
It’s how well you know
I’ve done this now
For twenty three
But more connected
I’m not sure I’ve been
I cannot, will not
Forget you ever
You have all, dear friends
Made me better.
Morning, all. Started extra early this morning. Decided at the last minute to continue “the tradition” of writing a sappy sy to each class, each kid. So, I got up at 2:45 this morning.
Today, I am going to share Periods 3 and 5. We are on a block schedule, so they are the only periods I have today. Sharing this here was not my original plan, but as I have spent my morning writing this, I do not have time to write a post. Tomorrow, I will share 2, 4, and 6.
Sappy Period 3
Up at 3:00 AM
Tryin’ to find a rhyme
Gotta do my Sappy
One last time
But this one’s different
Special you see
It’s the last one
To you from me
So here it is
Here we go
To all the young people
I love and know
First there’s Evie
Who made our hearts full
When she shouted to the world
“‘I’m beautiful.”
Faith comes next
She’s pretty hip
She even pierced that watchamacallit
On her lip
Seth is cool
He’s a music man
Rockin’ that bass
As best he can
Dusten B
He’s no bummer
We all know
He’s living for summer
And Ms. Emily
Ain’t no fake
She really does
Like all things snake
Sweet Sofia Voice of honey When she sings She makes it sunny
Don’t forget Will
He counts it down
Reminds us when
Santa’s coming to town
Ian Frazier
Is his name
Family-friendly
Is his game
Gabe once
Took a dive
We’re so glad
He’s still alive
Ms. Moriah
She loves food
Eats tacos like a boss
She’s no noob
Skyler’s name
Was planned it seems
It perfectly fits
His sky-high dreams.
Colbie H
Speaks with no fear
She’ll speak the truth
Into your ear.
Jason’s humor
Makes our day
We never know
What he might say
Haruka or Chicken
Take your pick
Wonder if the name
Will forever stick
Isaac always
has a smile
Ear to ear
Wide as a mile
Where’s Elissa?
Someone look
Or there she is
Writing a book
John’s kindness
Is without end
Anyone would be lucky
To call him friend
Kayli shoots
Behind her back
Shooting garbage
She’s got a knack
Marion imagines
And shares her mind
If Narnia exists
I think she’ll find
Marlena went first
Took the dare
Went in the middle
And danced on air
Lauren’s bravery
Is a wonder
When it comes to facing a challenge
She’s got thunder.
Duncan
Beats on the drum
He’s full of life
He’s full of fun
Anna runs
And Anna rocks
I think she owns
A million socks
Alex eats
Dinos for lunch
He roars their names
With each crunch
Hope lives up
To her name
Her message on body image
Takes true aim
Jamie’s heart
Is pure and true
A nicer person
I never knew
Avery, Avery
What did you do?
Trying to play volleyball
Without your shoe.
Corrina’s real
She shares her heart
She values all
It’s her art
Jennifer dances
Through life and day
She shows her grace
That’s her way
Cam is leaving
He has to part
But he’ll live on
In our hearts
Rylan leads
The music show
It’s her passion
We all know
Skyla dreams
Great big dreams
She destined for great
So it seems
Sarianne’s sweetest
Maybe of all
But she’ll fight for justice
When there’s a call
And now it seems
We’ve reached the end
And for that I’m sad
My dear young friends
I will miss you more
Than I can convey
But I hope these words
Will with you stay
Connections matter
They get us through
Could not have done this
Without you
You shared yourselves
Your ups and downs
You daily shared
Your Smiles and Frowns.
Look around
What do you see?
Not just a class
But a community
So, as you go
As you leave
As you follow
Your path that weaves
In and out
And around
Remember the connections
That you’ve found
And build some more
As you go
For it’s not how far you get
It’s how well you know
I’ve done this now
For twenty three
But more connected
I’m not sure I’ve been
I cannot, will not
Forget you ever
You have all, dear friends
Made me better.
Thank you.
I will miss you.
I love you.
Sappy Period 5
Up at 3:00 AM
Tryin’ to find a rhyme
Gotta do my Sappy
One last time
But this one’s different
Special you see
It’s the last one
To you from me
So here it is
Here we go
To all the young people
I love and know
First there’s Anthony
A talented chap
I’m quite envious
Of his rap
And Alexxis
For her part
On her sleeve
She wears her heart
Rachelle’s honesty
Hit us true
But she found community
In me and you
Lexi started
Us off each day
Truly a leader
In so many ways
Ez stayed
And we are glad
But when she’s gone
We’ll all be sad
Malea’s kindness
Shined on through
She may be quiet
But her heart is true
Quiet Cam
Listens here
And when she shares
We give a cheer
And then there’s Lindsay
Whom we admire
Her foster work
Does inspire
Dawson’s story
His ouch from flame
Did not affect
His soccer game
And Bre’s big smile
Full of fun
Even when down
She brings us sun
Another John
I never knew
Who’d miss a chance
To debate or argue.
Marisity
Our circus friend
Of surprises, it seems
There is no end
Andrew’s drive
To work and learn
Will take him far
Success he’ll earn
Bella
Loves everything sport
She knows the score
As she oft reports
Mr. K
Our music fan
He’s got layers
Like an onion, man
Callie
Our hallway gossip queen
But it’s all for fun
Not really mean
Can’t forget Chloe
Our friend of cheer
Hard not to smile
When she is near
And Leah
Who let us in
About her sight struggles
She fights to win
And Dre the brother
A quiet lad
But he laughs a laugh
That makes us glad.
Dylan of course
Is also here
And when he shares
We give a cheer
Wesley, my man
Is legit
We’ll always remember
When he said, “Oh, $h!t.”
And Mayah always ready
With a joke right quick
Also taught us how
To give one frick
Jasmine, Jasmine
Smart and able
Turned herself
Into a nutrition label
Jaela T
Here’s a fact
Girl gets it going
On the track
Veronica
We call her V
Wish she’d share more
With you and me
Anna. Who?
You know Xinyi
The name I pronounced
Incorrectly
Cole
Who showed us his heart
Gonna play a new role
The guy who’s smart
And J. Winner
Who always kept pace
He even taught us
How to Jase.
And last there’s Brayden
A smile that’s pure
I’m so glad that she
Has been here
And now it seems
We’ve reached the end
And for that I’m sad
My dear young friends
I will miss you more
Than I can convey
But I hope these words
Will with you stay
Connections matter
They get us through
Could not have done this
Without you
You shared yourselves
Your ups and downs
You daily shared
Your Smiles and Frowns.
Look around
What do you see?
Not just a class
But a community
So, as you go
As you leave
As you follow
Your path that weaves
In and out
And around
Remember the connections
That you’ve found
And build some more
As you go
For it’s not how far you get
It’s how well you know
I’ve done this now
For twenty three
But more connected
I’m not sure I’ve been
I cannot, will not
Forget you ever
You have all, dear friends
Made me better.
The joke is as old as homework. It’s been passed down from generation to generation. It’s part of our collective conscience; it’s rooted in school culture. “My dog ate my homework.” Code for “I didn’t do my homework.” We nod. We laugh. We know.
But, what if we don’t know? What if it really did eat it? I mean lots of dogs, lots of homework…it is possible. Ya never know. And that’s worth considering. And, even if it’s unlikely that a canine actually made a meal out of last night’s assignment, we never really know. Turns out, that there’s a lot we may not know. I didn’t know.
I didn’t know I’d find an email this morning from one of my students from 8:00 PM last night telling me she just got kicked out of her house, fretting over not being able to finish her presentation, worrying that she wouldn’t even be able to get to school, wondering where she was going to spend the night.
Suddenly, my class, my assignment seems small. Really small. In fact, it seems nothing at all compared to the bigger lessons, the bigger consequences at hand in this young lady’s life. At this moment, I am not worried about the assignment. I am worried about her. With only a few days left in the year, will I even see her again? I don’t know, which makes me wonder, what else don’t I know?
In this instance, she let me know. But as I think back on instances near and far, I wonder how often I didn’t know. I mean really know. A younger Sy, didn’t buy. Even a story like this, I may have thought it a dramatized, pathos-infused “dog story.” Fortunately, I have become what I believe is a better person, trading my cynicism for empathy–because I may never really know the whole story. So, I default now with empathy and flexibility. I have to own my view–right or wrong. And if I am wrong, I would rather it be from a place of empathy and flexibility, not cynicism or rigidity.
The dog ate the homework, or not. If so, then let them do it. Dogs do things, and it’s conceivable that it did really happen. If not, then still let them do it. It’s a missing assignment. It’s not a personal affront to us. It’s not a sure sign of one being destined to now live a life of irresponsibility. It’s a missing assignment. And how we react is everything. And, importantly, our response is our choice. We can choose flexibility. We can choose rigidity. After all, it seems we are responsible for the excuse. If not for fear of punishment, then kids would not have had to create it in the first place.
I have to make a choice. I have to put my head together with this young lady to figure out what we are going to do. And instead of my considering what I am going to do to her, I will go into the conversation with the mindset of what I am going to do for her. And then, once we’ve decided, that will be the path we follow.
But what about the other kids? What about the other kids who got their work done on time? Is that fair? What about them? Did they get kicked out of their home? If they had, I would have brokered them the same deal, or at least the same response: empathy, for no two situations are the same. Rigidity in the name of fairness is a farce. It is often sold as a high-minded, righteous response out of consideration of others. Please. Fairness is born of empathy, and it is considerate of all, for it recognizes not that all are the same but rather that all are different, and we need to respond accordingly.
The other kids? The other kids won’t know what I decide. It’s not their business. It’s not their learning. It’s not their life. It’s hers. I just happen to be in the same class as her. I showed up on her schedule, and in a year, we have shared time and space. How she lives in, learns from, and leaves that space is largely up to me. And that adds some weight to the choices I make. As such, I have to live with my choices. And though it wasn’t always so, I have learned I like living with my empathetic mistakes better than my cynical ones.
Not sure what it means in the grand scheme, but over the weekend, Project 180 finally hit 100,00 views. It only took 763 posts and 3 1/2 years to get there, but we got there. Of course, when I started back in January of 2016, I had no idea, really, that “there” would be here. Not sure what I expected at all. It all simply started as a good-natured dare by one of my students Megan Lavin.
So, I started blogging about education that first spring, which led me to launching year one of Project 180 in the fall. And as I wrap up year three, I am proud of the work behind me. Lots of early-morning musings and finger fumbling (I am a terrible typist) to get to here. But, it has made me a better teacher as I have come to intentionally reflect each day on my experiences in the classroom. It has also connected me with the education world at large, where I have become connected to, inspired and supported by so many amazing educators around the globe. Thank you, all, for the continued, kind support of the work I do. Could not have gotten “here” without you. Thank you.
Do I have another 180 in me? I think so. A lot of work remains, and I think I still have some fumble left in these old fingers. And, in truth, I am excited to share my work around an attempt at a feedback-only classroom next year. I feel like my work is evolving, like I am on to important next better. So, stay tuned, please. Project 180 will be around for at least another year. Thank you again for your support.
Today’s Trail
Along today’s trail we experience…
…scrambling to get all presentations done this week.
I imagine by her peers’ standards she’s strange. She keeps to herself. She has different interests. She says and does weird things. But, really, she’s neither strange nor weird; really, she’s just misunderstood.
Turns out, I have a lot of Ms. (and Mr.) Understood’s in the classroom. Always have. Always will. We are all different. We are all strange. We are all misunderstood. It’s the way of things. But I say this not as an admission of apathy. Rather, I say it as a recognition of reality. In our world, we misunderstand much. Of all, it seems we misunderstand each other. And why wouldn’t we? We don’t know each other. We can’t understand what we don’t know. So, then, to understand, we have to know. The goal has to be to know each other. In room 206, that is the goal.
In my room I want you to feel connected.
This is everything in my room. All else comes second. We work–deliberately and diligently–at this every day. No magic bullet. No shiny, canned, costly program. Just 31 people in a room connecting each day through Smiles and Frowns. I know I often talk about and talk up our daily ritual, gushing about its impact on our classroom community and culture, but it has been a powerful means to a powerful end, an end that I am witnessing from the front row. And from my perch, I am watching in real time “knowing” transforming into “understanding.” And yesterday, was the best yet. For yesterday, Miss Under stood.
She has refused to share her work all year long. Trapped in her anxiety, scarred by bullies and teasers in her past, aware of her socially awkward standing, she has hidden in the shadows, barely showing herself. Occasionally, intermittently, she has shared a smile or frown, but she has never shared her work, which I have always found to be our misfortune, for her work is good–really good. And as we neared the end of this project and approached the presentation part of it, she and I had already reached an agreement that–as always–she would not have to share her work. But, then, yesterday, something happened. Miss Under stirred.
Maybe she was having one of her “less-bad” days (for her, good). Maybe she was inspired by her peers’ sharing their work. Maybe she finally believed me when I told her that she had good stuff. Maybe it was merely a fluke. Regardless the reason, as the period began, and I was asking if anyone wanted to fill the two vacant spots in the presentation schedule, she spoke up.
“Sy, I guess I can go.”
“Really?” (shocked)
“But only my poem.”
“You sure?” I was still in shock.
“I don’t know. Maybe. Maybe not” (anxiety coming to life).
“Let’s let the others go first. And if you go, great. If you don’t, all good.”
And then, when it was time, she stood. Miss Under stood. And she shared not only her poem but all of her pieces. Afraid for her, I quickly scanned the room, worried how the kids might respond. But they–and I should have known better–regarded her as one of the “family,” transfixed by the wondrous work the weird girl in the corner shared from atop her moment’s mountain. It was a palpably surreal moment for me, for all of us. And at the end, I marveled as she read through her peers’ kind comment cards, smiling bigger than I have ever seen her smile.
We won’t soon forget what we now better know and better understand about Miss Under. We will all remember the day she stood. More, she won’t forget either. She, I believe, better understands, too.
Today’s Trail
Along today’s trail we will experience…
…celebrating our connections. There is nothing else.
There was laughter. There were tears. There was empathy. There was discovery. There was affirmation. There was honesty. There was courage. There was us.
As I’d hoped, we got off to a great start with our “This Is Me” presentations.
Well, the kids did. I…well, I fumbled the ball a bit. I didn’t plan well. I thought six presentations a day was a good target, thinking 5-7 minutes each would be just about right. I was wrong. Really wrong, for they are taking far longer. The kids wrote more than I expected. Wrote more than I expected. Is that really a problem in an English class? At present, yes.
I apologized every period yesterday. My poor planning put kids in unfair situations, where they now have to deal with the anxiety of presenting again because they did not get to go on their scheduled day. They were gracious in their understanding, but still, I was not pleased with myself. And worse, because time is short–5 days to go–we are in a bit of a crisis mode, a crisis that could have been avoided, and no one’s to blame but me. Consequently, crisis requires action.
Though it breaks my heart and my self-set vow to do Smiles and Frowns every day–no matter what, we will not be doing Smiles and Frowns for the next few days. We need every minute. I have also asked the kids, who have longer pieces, to consider only sharing two instead of three. In the end, we will make it work, but I need to do better in the future, making sure I have allotted enough time. It is not fair to put kids in these situations.
There’s more. I also thought “my plan” would allow me to conduct the end-of-semester learning conferences with each of the presenters after the day’s presentations. Not sure what kind of math I was doing, but…well, it didn’t/doesn’t add up. So, our sacred conferences have now become paper conferences. Instead of a face-to-face, the kids will just submit their select-and-support grade sheets, and I will respond in kind–on paper. For those with whom I agree–the vast majority, I will not confer with them in person. For those with whom I do not agree, I will have to find time to sit and talk with them, until we reach an agreement. Great planning, Sy. Ugh.
But all was not lost. Poor planning aside, the kids rocked it yesterday. I was so proud of what they created and shared. One moment in particular stood out for me. It was during sixth period. She was the the third to go, and she presented a present. Jen (name changed) gave us a gift.
“In here, I am not basketball Jen. I am not hallway Jen. I am not student Jen. In here, I am Jen. This is me.”
This is how she began her self-introduction. What a gift to tell a community that she can be herself among them, that she does not have to be someone that she’s not. She was not done.
She then went on to share a brief personalized message with each person in the room, a testament to her connection with them, a connection that allows Jen to be Jen.
It was a proud moment for me. Connections matter–deeply to me. This is a gift I will cherish. This is fuel for my fire to continue advocating for connections in the classroom. But Jen wasn’t done. She threw me another morsel to feed my crazy convictions in the 180 classroom. This was her response to question one on her learning conference sheet.
As has often been the case in my experience, kids saved the day. I fumbled. They shined. And Jen blinded me with her brilliance. Maybe I should have had her plan the presentation schedule.
Today’s Trail
Along today’s trail we will experience…
…connecting through Smiles and Frowns. (this kills me)
Finally. Been many weeks in the making, but we are finally ready to start presenting our “This is Me” projects. Ranging from lyrical essays to comics to top-ten lists to poems, kids will begin sharing their pieces with their peers today. Each will share a self-introduction and three published pieces of their choice.
Selecting from eight different mode options that could take myriad forms, kids had to write five pieces for the project. The overarching goal was to dig deeper into their own identities and to share their discoveries, their work with our classroom community. Let us know you better were the words behind the work.
In truth, we all know each other quite well. I would even venture so far to say that, in terms of kids’ knowing other kids in a classroom community, there is likely no other room in the building where this is more true than mine. Please know, I am not saying this to brag; I am not saying this to suggest I do it better. I just do it. It’s a priority. Atop my list of self-standards for how I want kids to feel in my classroom is “connected.” I want kids to feel connected: to me, to each other, to themselves. So, we work–diligently, daily–towards that end. Of course our means has been Smiles and Frowns, but even that has its limits at only minutes per day. There is always a better around the bend, and in terms of our knowing each better, this project serves as a “connection capstone” of sorts. We will know better.
Further, never one to miss an opportunity to deepen connections, I have come up with a way to let the presenters know we know better. I will ask my kids to write a brief personal response to each presenter. I will cut out and distribute paper squares, asking kids to write something to their peers in response to the hard work they’ve done to share themselves with their community.
I live for moments like these. I love seeing kids in their moments. I particularly love seeing kids’ moments being celebrated, honored by their classroom community. The next five days will be supremely satisfying for me. I could not ask for a better end to such an awesome year. Of course, it does come with a cost. Knowing better means parting is harder. I will miss these kiddos. A lot. But for now, I am going to soak them in as they share themselves, as we share each other. If there is a better way to end our journey, I know not that better.
“How much time do you spend up in front of the class?”
I am taking on a student teacher next fall. Been awhile. Hard for me to “give up” my kids. But I also recognize the role we need to play to help those entering the profession, so I agreed to “share” a student teacher with my grade-level partner. Of course, it helped that I knew the candidate prior to my agreeing to take her on. She was in my classroom management course at the university. As such, I knew she’d be a fit, which is key.
Yesterday, she spent the day with us, observing, taking notes, asking questions. Near the end of the day, she asked the question above. “How much time do you spend up in front of the class?”
Very little. In fact, with the arrangement of the room, one may not even be sure where the front is. More, if one were to observe, as she did yesterday, most of my time is spent alongside rather than in front of. But that wasn’t always the case.
I used to spend half the period up there. I thought I had to. And I thought I was good at. I could talk a lesson up like a pro. And the more I talked, the more I liked what I was hearing, so the more I talked. I talked and talked and talked. I thought that was teaching. Man, did I waste a lot of time. Years.
“Very little, kiddo. Very little. I spend my time alongside kids, giving them feedback–as you saw today. That’s what I’ve come to believe is teaching. I will spend no more than 5-7 minutes introducing a task. I just want the kids to have enough to get going because it’s during the going, the doing that teaching and learning occur. I used to think the key was in the frontloading of the lesson. But too often I discovered that my “fantastic frontloads” were falling flat, so I changed. It was a gradual change, to be sure, because I had to let go of what I thought was important, what I ‘knew’ I was good at. Next year, when you and I are co-teaching, we will spend our time among kids, not in front of kids.”
Sometimes, though my I am resolute in my beliefs, I wonder if I shouldn’t be up front more. Of course, I think it’s just the old days, the old ways tugging at me. But tug as they may, I will stay, where I am, alongside kids.
Today’s Trail
Along today’s trail we will experience…
…connecting through Smiles and Frowns.
…wrapping up writing. Tomorrow, we start presenting.
She is one of my best writers, and so I was surprised that something as seemingly simple as a self-intro was giving her trouble.
“Well. Well, I…how do I say this? I don’t know how to write it without sounding rude or conceited. As you know, I am not really into this whole connection thing, and I don’t want to be fake, but I don’t want people to take things the wrong way, either. I’m stuck.”
I do know. A reluctant sharer in Smiles and Frowns, she “passes” most of the time, and I have come to accept and respect that, knowing it’s simply a matter of her wanting to keep to herself. But with the parameters I’ve set for the intro, really for the project, it’s kinda hard to keep to oneself.
For the intro, I asked the kids to approach it from a place of familiarity: Please write this with us and the year in mind. Please write it with a familiar, conversational tone. It’s just us.
“Ah,” I responded, “it’s the familiarity thing isn’t it?”
“Yeah. It’s not that I haven’t found any familiarity or created any connections; I just think it’d be weird to all the sudden “gush familiarity.” It’s not me. When we began the year, and you introduced the idea of community and connection through Smiles and Frowns, I was not thrilled. In fact, my thinking was, ‘No one in here cares what I have to say, and I don’t care what they have to say either.’ I wasn’t here to get to know people. I like classes that are get down to business, and so I was annoyed that we’d have to spend time getting to know each other.”
“I know. Sorry that my class has not been that class for you. It’s just how I do things.”
“I know. And my mind has changed over the year, at least with this class. I do know that people in here care about each other, and they do care about what I say. I have experienced a transformation, but it’s still feels weird to act like we’re all familiar now. That’s why it’s hard. So, I don’t know how to write my intro.”
“I think you just did, kiddo. Just be honest with us. Just be yourself. That’s who we expect and want you to be. On day one, when I introduced Smiles and Frowns, I also told you what your number one role was in here for the year: Be yourself. Just be yourself. Tell us about your struggle, your transformation. Speak your truth.”
“Okay. I can do that. Thank you for talking through this with me.”
“Of course. Thank you for coming to me with this. I don’t ever want you to be who you are not.”
Roles Here are the various roles that I will need you to play over the course of the year. Sometimes, our day’s path will require you play one specific role; most times, our path will require that you play many simultaneously. Either way, I promise I will not ask you to stretch yourself beyond your limits. You got this.
Role #1: Yourself. This is your most important role. I need you to be who you are. I realize that the setting in which we find ourselves sometimes impacts our ability to be ourselves, but my hope is that the classroom community and culture we create during our time together will give each of us the comfort and confidence to be who we are. This is the role that matters most to me as I join you in your journey this year. I am excited to know YOU.
Not everyone likes the kumbaya of community and connection. I know that. I get that. And that’s why I am so proud of Jessica (name changed) for coming to me with her truth. It could not have been easy for her. In the end, I am glad we could find a way to make it work for her. By the way, the writing that she has prepared to share with her peers is unbelievable. I cannot wait to experience her and their reactions to the shared moment. And though she’s not about connections, I think she will not soon forget this opportunity to connect with her peers. Connections.
Today’s Trail
Along today’s trail we will experience…
…reconnecting through Smiles and Frowns.
…growing as writers (2 days till the project wraps up and presentations begin).
